| Sadly whether we like to admit it or not, | | | | This is because courts tend to view marriages |
| Divorce is a growing part of society's day to | | | | lasting at least ten years or more as longer |
| day existence. More and more of us are | | | | term. Therefore, you may be eligible for a |
| getting divorced on a much more regular basis | | | | portion of your spouse's pension and social |
| and some even seem to be making career moves | | | | security benefits (when you reach the age to |
| out. Of course divorce is one of the subjects | | | | claim these), and you may qualify for |
| that we try to avoid when we embark on a | | | | alimony. It's all good reason to speak with |
| relationship and indeed when we get married | | | | an attorney before moving out. |
| but sadly it is not a subject that at least | | | | |
| 25% of us will avoid in our lives. | | | | 2. Become a financial sleuth. Obtain |
| | | | statements and balances for bank accounts, |
| It we accept that divorce is possibly a | | | | plus copies of wills and trusts. Make |
| potential outcome of a relationship breakdown | | | | duplicate copies of computer files-with |
| then quite frankly we are duty bound to make | | | | financial data. The Social Security office |
| sure that it is taken seriously. This means | | | | can give you a current report of earning for |
| quite frankly, first and foremost, taking | | | | both of you. Collect as many of your spouse's |
| care of family issues and making them a | | | | pay stubs as possible. In some professions |
| priority especially if there are children | | | | there are multiple pay checks. For instance, |
| involved. Remember folks, I don't want to | | | | a police officer might receive separate |
| sound as if I'm being moralistic, far from | | | | payment for his court appearances. Or there |
| it, but the children did not ask to get | | | | could be bonuses or commissions accounted for |
| involved and quite frankly again, those who | | | | on separate pay stubs. Most of this shows up |
| use their children as bargaining tools are | | | | on a W-2. |
| beneath contempt. By all means haggle over | | | | |
| the family real estate and bank account but | | | | 3. Safeguard heirlooms and liquid assets. |
| leave the children out of it and make sure | | | | Seek appraisals for artwork, antiques, and |
| that they all well catered for. | | | | other collectibles. Take any sentimental or |
| | | | important objects to a friend's house for |
| However if you have any type of idea that a | | | | safekeeping. Be certain that your name is |
| separation and divorce is headed in your | | | | recorded on the house deed or apartment |
| direction, then there are certain things that | | | | lease. Do not stash cash in a safe deposit |
| you can practically do. Don't feel guilty | | | | box; for pending litigation, boxes are |
| about taking these measures if you must. | | | | sometimes sealed. Make sure you revoke any |
| Messy breakups which lead to divorce can show | | | | powers of attorney your spouse may have and |
| the darker side of your partner. | | | | ask brokerage firms to check for |
| | | | identification before your name is signed to |
| 1. Knowledge is power. Know where you and | | | | anything. |
| your spouse have bank accounts, life | | | | |
| insurance policies, mutual funds, | | | | 4. Open a bank account in your name. It only |
| certificates of deposit, all other | | | | takes one party to raid an account, and you |
| instruments of finance, and important | | | | don't want to be left without any money. |
| documents such as social security cards, | | | | Certainly do not deposit any more of your own |
| passports, birth and stock certificates, and | | | | money into a joint account, even if you |
| the details of pension, 401 (k), and other | | | | transfer that into your own name. Establish a |
| employee benefits. Know the location of and | | | | new account for future deposits, preferably |
| have access to safe deposit boxes. Your | | | | at another bank. This is where you can keep |
| county recorder of deeds can help you track | | | | an emergency fund to live on and pay legal |
| down real estate and deeds. | | | | bills, at least until support is established. |
| | | | Don't be surprised if a spouse petitions for |
| If your marriage is just short of the | | | | joint accounts to be frozen, pending |
| ten-year mark, you may want to wait it out, | | | | equitable distribution in a divorce. This is |
| if you can and if it's safe. You'll have more | | | | another reason to have your own access to |
| bargaining power in matters such as alimony, | | | | funds. |
| social security, pension benefits, and more. | | | | |